Taking a break...

some updates about Jenna's Column <3

Girl with a Cat by Ivan Kramskoy

Don’t be alarmed. Your favorite newsletter is not disappearing; it is just slowing down a bit.

I take a lot of precautions not to share anything too personal on Substack because, ya know, boundaries are good, but let me just be really real with you for a sec.

I have been talking with the Lord and He has been showing me how while my Substack has been really life-giving and good, I have been bringing a lot of spiritual knowledge on here I am learning in seminary, maybe before it has fully penetrated my heart.

I will be reading an incredible book by Dallas Willard, or Henri Nouwen and think, omg I want to write about this! It is usually my first impulse, maybe instead of actually turning to the face of God and asking, Lord, what do you want to teach me about this? It can be easier for me to think about God than actually be with God. I wonder if any of you guys relate to that! And I think that having deadlines and paid subscriber content I have to have up every week, has been ramping that up, in a bad way.

Because I am always thinking through a million ideas, the weekly devotional made a lot of sense. Plus, I wanted to start monetizing my Substack, which has been such a gift. That additional post is fun for me to write, but I feel an invitation from the Lord to push past my inclination to immediately write about whatever I have learned in prayer, in my grad school reading (the most common culprit), or in class! I feel Him guiding me into a slower season of deeper intimacy with Him, and I think that will require a new kind of hiddenness from me.

I want to write about faith and spirituality for the foreseeable future. It is my life’s dream and it’s my favorite thing to do! I also love to stick to a deadline and a goal so this feels REALLY HARD. Removing deadlines and moving goal posts feels so unnatural! But I have found myself missing my weekly devotional deadlines lately and falling behind on my monthly essay + curation post. (Don’t worry, those are sticking around!)

This feels weird and hard for me. I am a high achiever and I have committed to this Substack in ways I am deeply proud of, but I feel a sense that God is not calling me to discipline and achievement right now. I sense He is calling me to rest.

So, I say all of this to say that I am removing my (self-imposed) deadlines from my Substack. I am guessing for most of you, you won’t even notice that, but I felt like I needed to tell you, and just update you on how your girl is doin’.

You will (almost, barring a life crisis) get a free essay and curation post from me each month. You might get other devotional posts, too, if the Spirit leads, and the essays and occasional devotional posts will get a paywall after four weeks. If you are a paid subscriber and you want to keep supporting me, that’s great. If you were here for the new content every week, I am sorry! Feel free to switch to a free subscription—no hard feelings.

As a writer, there is something important about pushing through and producing even when inspiration runs dry, but this feels different from that. I feel this deep inner quiet that is beckoned to be attended to, and I think I might miss it if I sit in front of my keyboard for too long, instead of adoring my Savior.

Thank you for all of your continued support. I am abundantly grateful for this community!!!!!!!

Your friend,